Turtlenecks and Pearls


So, I was thinking about the most random thing earlier today. The idea of Hell and what I would consider to be completely miserable consumed a few minutes of my afternoon. You know, classic work thoughts. Turtlenecks quickly came to mind.

When I was younger, I was forced to wear them and I despised them. Still do—but I just don’t wear them! The last time I did try to wear one, I had to go home and change because I couldn’t stop tugging at the collar of that ridiculous, maroon mf’er. Into the trash it went. 

Generally, I am not what one would consider to be claustrophobic; I mostly prefer safe, enclosed environments. The idea of endless space and/or falling into the sky has always been frightening to me. Keep me grounded, please!

Anyway, I came to the conclusion that, if the damned are forced to wear uniforms in Hell, a turtleneck must be a component of the agonizing outfit. My train of thought took me back to a story one of my besties told me years ago…

One day, she decided to wear a string of pearls she had inherited from some family member. She was going out that night and the look just seemed right. The feeling did not last long—she found herself at a social gathering feeling choked by her glistening heirloom. What ensued was a certain sort of struggle.

She tried and tried to properly remove the necklace, but could not seem to subdue the bastard. After giving it her best shot, she finally seized hold of the sinister strangler and ripped it right off. Pearls broke loose and fell to the ground.

From the way she described the experience, I am confident she does not regret breaking the necklace and does not miss it at all. I can empathize—because of the turtlenecks. One person’s accessories and garments can truly be another person’s worst nightmare.

As I am typing, I can almost feel the devil’s hands around my neck.


Z

 

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Words

A sales meeting in 1956; Cincinnati

Words

You know what I think:
The words that we say
could very well be shot
back to us one day

Do I think about
tomorrow?
Life’s little invoices do
tend to arrive after
the make-or-break
moments—
have passed us by

I need to try to make
each and every word
I can consciously say
feel good both now
and even after
today


Z

To not. look. sad.

To not. look. sad.

You are always down
after she leaves
No need to be!
Soon enough, I am sure
you could choose to miss her
once again

She will return—
and then fly away—
again. again. & again.
So, at least, do try your
damnedest, you!
to not. look. sad.


Z

The Finale

The Finale

Let’s be clear—I’m here
Naked and molding
Into the ground 
My amygdala was shot
Out of the cannon 
Into the sky
For the last time
Maybe I’ll stay
Maybe I’ll fly away
Come see this retiree
Confident and quite sure
He has nowhere to be



Z