Suddenly Kittens

Last weekend, 2 kittens came into my life. One was found by the next door neighbor—an orange tabby—and the other kitten (whose type is yet to be determined) was found around 11pm on my family’s front porch. She appeared the night before Father’s Day. The running joke is that my dad received a kitten as his gift. 

Anyone who knows my family knows we are dog people. Every dog in our lives is spoiled and incredibly loved. We have adopted many rescue dogs and believe doing so is better than buying a pet. We have owned cats in the past, but dogs took over our hearts—probably because we have not had cats in our lives in some time. After my favorite cat died, I started telling friends that I am not a cat person. All that changed when the kittens appeared last weekend. 

The neighbor found a home for the tabby at her vet’s office. The kitten who chose our home has won our hears and has moved in. She is the sweetest little thing. Honestly, she has totally hit the jackpot and seems to be well aware. I would have never thought my dad would have taken so quickly to our purring buddy. He definitely has. 

Her name is Frankie (I am the one who named her!) and she has proven us all wrong. I am, in fact, a cat person. Life makes me realize, more and more, of how little I know and how quickly I can be proven wrong about what I think I do.

I could go on, but I should probably go check in on the kitten…

One day, I will look back
at a photograph of you
and think to myself
You were so damn cute!
Well, I will be right,
because you are



Z

Turtlenecks and Pearls


So, I was thinking about the most random thing earlier today. The idea of Hell and what I would consider to be completely miserable consumed a few minutes of my afternoon. You know, classic work thoughts. Turtlenecks quickly came to mind.

When I was younger, I was forced to wear them and I despised them. Still do—but I just don’t wear them! The last time I did try to wear one, I had to go home and change because I couldn’t stop tugging at the collar of that ridiculous, maroon mf’er. Into the trash it went. 

Generally, I am not what one would consider to be claustrophobic; I mostly prefer safe, enclosed environments. The idea of endless space and/or falling into the sky has always been frightening to me. Keep me grounded, please!

Anyway, I came to the conclusion that, if the damned are forced to wear uniforms in Hell, a turtleneck must be a component of the agonizing outfit. My train of thought took me back to a story one of my besties told me years ago…

One day, she decided to wear a string of pearls she had inherited from some family member. She was going out that night and the look just seemed right. The feeling did not last long—she found herself at a social gathering feeling choked by her glistening heirloom. What ensued was a certain sort of struggle.

She tried and tried to properly remove the necklace, but could not seem to subdue the bastard. After giving it her best shot, she finally seized hold of the sinister strangler and ripped it right off. Pearls broke loose and fell to the ground.

From the way she described the experience, I am confident she does not regret breaking the necklace and does not miss it at all. I can empathize—because of the turtlenecks. One person’s accessories and garments can truly be another person’s worst nightmare.

As I am typing, I can almost feel the devil’s hands around my neck.


Z